This week isn’t even over yet and I’ve found…. thieves of joy.
That’s right… thieves of joy! Here are some things this week that made me mad for very shallow reasons. I guess I could post about legitimate world problems that upset me, but I tend to want to stay lighthearted. There’s enough anger about that elsewhere.
3. New York Comic Con is a mind-f*ck
When I heard that the panel and autographing schedule would be released this past Tuesday, I purposely cut off the world in order to refresh the con’s page until I got what I wanted. I did… to an extent. While there are a ton of celebrity names listed on the official website, I am still waiting for the main attractions. I mean come on, we know The Walking Dead will likely highlight the famous comic and entertainment convention for the second year in a row. I know this because not only is it the 10th anniversary for Robert Kirkman’s graphic novel of the same name, and not because I spied Andrew Lincoln’s name on the “search” drop-down menu, but because The Walking Dead is on the official badge of the convention. I did the overnight camping fiasco last year and I will do it again for a chance to meet some new cast members, but I’m looking for Game of Thrones. So far all that is listed is James Cosmo (Lord Commander Mormont), Jerome Flynn (Bronn) and Roxanne McKee (Doreah). San Diego Comic Con got all the heavy hitters, including Kit Harington (Jon Snow), Emilia Clarke (Daenerys Targaryen), Richard Madden (Robb Stark), Peter Dinklage (Tyrion Lannister), and the writer and creator of the hit franchise George R. R. Martin himself. I am praying to the Seven that at least one of those actors will be in attendance. But why make con-goers wait any longer? Just release all guests at the same time. It’s not like this convention is costing attendees boatloads of money or anything…
2. Zac Efron is a cocaine addict.
I mean let’s be real, I didn’t lose sleep over the news that High School Musical star Zac Efron was just released from rehab for an apparent coke addiction. However, it makes me a little sad that even the actors you think have a shred of decency in them are actually all types of high and feinding to the max for what I would consider a pretty intense drug. TMZ reported that Efron’s management team claimed he checked into an LA rehab for alcohol abuse. It was later revealed that the super dreamy teen idol’s cocaine addiction had him missing days of filming on the set of Seth Rogan’s flick Neighbors. How very Lindsay Lohan a la Georgia Rule of him! Sources close to the actor also say he “dabbled” in Molly. Can one just dabble in straight MDMA? Anywho, I like Zac Efron and appreciated his ability to give parents around the world faith in today’s entertainment role models. When you have money like he does, I’m sure it’s certainly difficult to say no to just about anything. Zac, stick to being beautiful and having the freedom of chosing literally whoever you want to sleep with. That sounds like a much better problem.
1. Snooki is on Dancing With the Stars
I don’t even watch DWTS. I swear. But I am so entirely sick of ex-Jersey Shore alum Snooki that even when she appears on television programs I don’t watch I get pissed. I understand what Dancing With the Stars is and respectfully decline to ever give it a shot, however, the more Nicole ‘Snooki’ Polizzi gets invited to be on such programs, the more I have to read about her everywhere else. I mean, I like celebrity gossip. I effectively scour my most visited sites such as TMZ and Perez Hilton regularly just to get the scoop on what’s going on in La La Land. Snooki, on the otherhand, is not a real celebrity. And while I watched all seasons of Jersey Shore, unapologetically, the show is now over. Let it be done. As if hearing about Snooki doing the waltz wasn’t bad enough, I now stumble upon health tips from the former boozer and fist-pumper. Oh, alright, let me just revamp my eating habits to mimic hers, because I have as much money and time as she does! Like any celebrity giving diet tips, I don’t want to hear it. I just want the reign of Snooki to be over. No more Halloween costumes, no more spin-off television shows, no more shoving this pseudo-celebrity down my throat. Also, for the record, Jersey Shore quotes do not and should never apply to real life situations.