The 10 Commandments of Dating
In my early blogging days, I used to love ranting; I would vent and shake my internet head and snap my internet fingers with conviction- listen to the word of the almighty advice-giver, Sarah! People who knew me personally likely cringed at the abundance of F-bombs I dropped to prefix words like ‘disrespect’ and ‘effortless’; further damning blossoming and crumbling relationships alike.
In light of a slew of recent relationship problems amongst people I know, as well as issues I come across on social networks, I am posting a blog reminiscent of sarah On The Go past. Gather ’round, kids, it is time for Sarah’s point of view… my favorite point of view.
10. Make time for one another
Surprisingly, the world does not revolve around your schedule. I get it, you work and… whatever. Get in your car and get down to that person if it means making he/she happy, especially if you are the one complaining you do not spend enough time together. Um, totally fixable. Pedal to the metal, my friend.
9. Put the effin’ phone down
As important as you think you are, I swear your fanbase won’t cry during that hour of dinner. It is as simple as this: the phone can wait. Go to the bathroom and do it if you have to, but if you have to, you are likely a tool.
8. Refrain from complimenting other good-looking individuals
Duh? No, apparently not. I hear about the guys doing this more than the ladies, but it goes for both of you. What on this planet makes you think your date wants to hear about the swarms of smokin’ hot bitches you had last summer, in college… throughout your entire post-pubescent life? Keep that immature fratboy-esque chatter out of your date conversation, it is beyond rude.
7. Stop holding your ex accountable
That last relationship is over and done with, so move it along! Always worrying about what the other is doing, ie: trust issues, and relationship-gone-wrong-in-the-past-induced-paranoia will not get you anywhere but alone on a Friday night with lots of ice cream and a cat or ten. As much as I love nights in, mint chip ice cream and feline friends, socializing with my boy is lots more fun! You have heard it before, “your ex is an ex for a reason.” Amen!
6. Chivalry aint dead
Boys, this is so for you. I have always been an advocate for old-fashioned dating. As an outsider, if I see a guy walk into a building before his girl, I swear to the Lord above I will call you out. You do not, however, need to feed your date and/or walk them to the little girl’s room, but paying more often than not is necessary. Once (and if) the two of you are official, she can open her wallet. Kiss her on the cheek goodnight, don’t expect so much and be a gentleman- it goes a long way.
5. Quit reciting eHarmony commercials
I certainly would not want to hear anyone sit there and bore me about the 1,000 qualities they look for in a person. “Genuine, caring, driven, down-to-earth…” zZZZZz. I could not imagine trying to have a real, hearty conversation if it starts like this. So you like girls that are a thesaurus worth of the word fun? You, my dear, are the opposite.
4. Accept some jealousy
With hundreds of sit-downs with friends over this very topic under my belt, I have learned that jealousy is definitely all right- to an extent. If you have some chick posting all over your Facebook wall and your new lady is upset about it, why would you try to make her feel like she is not just to feel that way. Jealousy is a natural feeling when us humans are diggin’ someone. Making the other person out to be crazy is fucking annoying and not compassionate in the slightest.
3. Don’t judge a book by its cover
Finally the master cliche has arrived. Assuming your new date is the perfect specimen for dating is cuckoo. We all have our issues, we all have a past and we certainly are all not perfect. If you already had a little bit of an issue or quarrel, let it go and try not to judge him/her based on that entirely. People are sensitive beings and it is easy to say irrational things out of hurt or anger. Let things go!
2. Avoid wasting each other’s time
If the two of you have been seeing each other for more than a month, it is presumed that having a conversation about each of your futures as separates is expected, as it should be comfortable. Does he/she just want to date (while they date others)? Do they want to eventually have a more serious relationship? Are they never looking to settle down the way you are? These are questions you need to ask yourself before investing a lot of emotion into someone who could potentially be wasting your time. There is always the “friends-only” option.
1. Embrace things that the other likes
Just because you do not listen to that odd band your girl likes, doesn’t mean she is the only fan in the world. Go to a show with her. If you do not like sports but your dude does, get your ass to a baseball game. Fun is to be had everywhere. If we were all alike, the world would be a very boring place. There is a lot to learn from people, and it may just be that quirky hobby your new beau loves that drives you crazier for them.
If you like this post, try this one: http://sarahonthego.com/2012/03/06/10-commandments-of-social-situations/